the intricacies of a ranting mind

Crazy Talk From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (2 days old)

This blog has become phenomenally unpopular. So few people read my musings that I’d imagine a notice nailed to a fence post somewhere in the wilds of Dartmoor would attract more attention from occasio… more

Rift Riff From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (6 days old)

In 2005 a 35-mile rift opened up in the desert in Ethiopia in a matter of days. This was caused by the rifting of the African and Arabian plates. The African and Arabian plates have been moving apart … more

Cannabis Correspondent From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (9 days old)

Have you been following the news about the government’s chief drug advisor Professor Nutts? I’ll just give you a quick run down to get you up to speed: Nutts was stiffing for his government bread-w… more

Soul Fight! From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (16 days old)

I’m particularly enjoying the manoeuvrings of the Roman Catholic Church this week. If you haven’t heard, The Pope, Benedict XVI, a man that looks like Baron Von Greenback in a white toupee, has issued… more

I wrote a cartoon From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (17 days old)

the picture is too wide for this blog, so I posted it here. … more

Cartoon From mjohnson in The MJohnson File (17 days old)

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Oh Dear From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (17 days old)

I have just made a profile for Nick Griffin on Interracialromance.com Nick Griffin Headline: Orthodox Opinions - Pah! Describe Yourself: I'm an author, journalist, political campaigner, p… more

Did you see question time on Thursday? From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (18 days old)

Oh you missed it, watch the highlights: From Cassetteboy.… more

Nick From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (19 days old)

Nick had nothing to contribute to the world. He was unemployed and cronically lazy, he had not earned a days wages in almost a decade. After Nick lost his job he’d tried to stay positive, at first he … more

GoCompare - Open Letter From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (20 days old)

Dear Chris Wilkins and Sian Vickers I understand that you are the husband and wife creative team responsible for Gio Compario the fictional opera singer currently featuring in adverts for the price… more

Adam Curtis on Helmand From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (27 days old)

I've already put this link in my Delicious links, but I also want to make a note of it here. It's a link to a post by the documentary maker Adam Curtis, the man who responsible for The Power of Nightm… more

Movie Time From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (38 days old)

I made this film - won't let me embed it though. You just can't get the staff! Watch it by following this link. http://www.xtranormal.com/watch?e=20091004143640386… more

Begging Letter From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (43 days old)

My girlfriend wants to see Fat Freddy’s Drop at Hammersmith Apollo. Having never heard of them, I’m not that keen, but since I don’t want her to have fun without me, and I don’t permit her to be outsi… more

Chicken-Tikka Lasagne From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (48 days old)

I’ve just eaten a whole English pound’s worth of Iceland’s Chicken-Tikka Lasagne for lunch and it’s opened my eyes to a whole new world of food. Does this development mark the dawn of an exciting new … more

999 – Emergency! From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (68 days old)

I’ve recently signed myself up to the 10:10 campaign; this involves pledging to reduce my carbon emissions by 10% in 2010 and yesterday I read about the Mayor of London’s low carbon neighbourhood sche… more

Swines From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (75 days old)

Someone’s been messing with my lunch. I can’t seem to decide what to eat any more. You see my number one sandwich choice used to be ham, BBQ Ham and elemental cheese bloomer to be precise. I love a bi… more

Brent Cross Ikea From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (78 days old)

I wrote an online review of the Brent Cross Ikea: This store is huge and blue you can’t miss it, anyone who has driven along the North circular in London will have seen it. The North Circular is on… more

Press Release From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (85 days old)

"Phil Collins, the star of Buster, has died today in a freak accident while fixing a TV ariel. This is reminiscent of Rod Hull who died while trying to adjust the reception during a Man Utd game. Rod … more

Time Wasting Game From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (89 days old)

http://www.virtuallydateariane.com/# This game has been the smash hit time wasting option in my office this week, even managing to push setting up your fantasy football team into second place. The … more

Frightening Prospect. From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (89 days old)

I was thinking about the story of the Brazilian TV Presenter who started to order murders to raise the ratings of his TV show and I started thinking about a world in which everyone was as self serving… more

Men's Health From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (107 days old)

It has been said that Swine Flu has killed Man Flu. Before this summer’s prime-time pandemic came around, when a man started groaning and calling out in an effected murmur for the final embrace of swe… more

Panic Pandemic From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (112 days old)

I’ve just read a piece in the Guardian. Apparently the panic surrounding the swine flu is more dangerous than swine flu. LINK. More dangerous than swine flu! How can that be possible? As if we did… more

Plynth Synth From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (118 days old)

I’m enjoying the plinth. The webcam is good, gives you something to look at in the office while you watch the ashes score tick by. No nudity as yet, bloody amateurs. Why have Britain’s professional ‘L… more

MJohnson Speaks to Himself From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (119 days old)

A while back I went through a phase of writing short questionnaires and sending them to the great and good. Unfortunately the response was underwhelming (most people didn’t respond, those that did wer… more

Lost Pigeon From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (121 days old)

A friend of mine found one of these in London with a London number on it and ‘call Steve’ at the end, a very funny, if not entirely original, practical joke. She thought it was so funny she took it ho… more

Crowd, Wise You Are From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (124 days old)

There’s a fire in London today. Fires are a nice bit of excitement in a boring office. People start popping up saying things like “I can smell smoke”, then we all earnestly discuss whether we should b… more

Teen Pregnancy Project Ditched From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (126 days old)

A multi million pound NHS programme to reduce teen pregnancy has been cancelled after results have shown that the rate of pregnancy increased within the group compared to similarly at risk groups not … more

Johnson Fest From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (127 days old)

This is it people – it’s your last chance to snap up a ticket for the inaugural Johnson Fest: Johnson Fest 2009. This years festival is to hosted at Tim’s house, 15 The Grove, Sydenham, SE26. Tickets … more

Dear Diary From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (128 days old)

Life’s complicated when you have a girlfriend. I don’t mean complicated in a Dawson’s Creek, anxty soundtrack, oh other people’s feelings are so complicated, hey let’s watch black and white films, oh … more

C.V. From mjohnson in Mg Fg Tg (132 days old)

With talk of redundancy in the air I thought it was time for me to dust of the old C.V. and update it with all my recent achievements! Date of birth: I was concieved, millions of other sperm didn… more